It doesn’t seem possible that there was a time we didn’t know them. And yet I remember knowing the previous neighbors well enough to feel leery of new and unknown people moving in next door. I remember the day they moved in, Brian first. I remember the awkward feeling of not remembering which one was Brian and which one was Darin – wondering if I had even met both of them yet. I remember that they borrowed our tools, and returned them with a bottle of wine and some lemons from their tree artfully tied to the bottle. They were neighbors. We were friendly with them in that formal way you have with people who you share a neighborhood with, but nothing more.
Then it was baby time. And we knew we would be running off to Iowa at a moments notice, so we let a few of the neighbors know, and promised to keep them posted. I recorded their email addresses with “(neighbor)” following their names so that I would remember who they were. It was their mail back to us, welcoming Brendan, that started the first true cracks in my stranger-danger heart:
Alright! You make me sick! I’m disgusted! This is awful! I’M SO JEALOUS!! LOL.. What’s the saying? Baby Envy?
The story is so amazing! On all accounts, it seems like the most perfect story was written and has played out for all involved. We are so happy for you and looking forward to watching a whole new family move in next door!!
Brendan is the cutest baby ever!! Better looking than any baby ever was in mine or Darin’s families, nieces and nephews included.
Whomever took this shot should get an award…a million dollar prize for “priceless” and no other person should ever take a picture again as no picture will ever be better than this one!
OK… so, lot’s of amazing shots, and … thank you SO much for sharing with us! I think we feel all caught up on your life and feel like we’ve known you forever.
These days, you can find websites that are selling all type of herbal products. buying this buy cheap viagra That is why; the medical science has invented a new kind of a medicine that works in a similar way, buy viagra but are not identical. If you suspect that the capsule is an illegal store sildenafil viagra generico which should not be referred to buy medicines. This drug will help you to get back into their sparking love life which had faded away due to this disorder. cialis viagra australia works in an excellent manner by curing it completely ensuring a 100% result to the consumer.
Thank You Thank You! Again, let us know if you need anything and travel safe!! Got my eyes on the house!!Brian
Then we came home, the three of us. We discovered that they had mowed our lawn for us. Rob and I spent blissfully tired months home all day with our son. And while my present self can’t fathom it, there weren’t any coffee dates with Brian, there weren’t any late night bottles of wine with the four of us glued to the image on the baby monitor of our son snuggled in upstairs. And then one day a homemade slider was passed over the fence. And maybe it’s true when they say that the way to a man (and woman’s) heart is through the stomach, because that was the next real crack around my heart. And it is the last one I can remember because after that all I know is that we had two uncles living next door. Two best friends. And food and babies being exchanged over the fence was an almost daily occurrence. And piggy back rides up and down our block, and spontaneous sprinkler parties, and times spent around one kitchen counter or the other sorting out whatever needed to be sorted.
And I recognized that this was an important piece of the life I always wanted, but never could have imagined.
And now they are moving. For great reasons, for Darin being recognized for all that he is capable of, and taking that next important step in his career. They have moved lots of times. They have friends dotting the globe. But that is not me – I’m the girl who has moved 3 times in 42 years. I am guarded about those I let into my inner circle. But you don’t have to be guarded with family. With people whom, very symbolically, we had serious talks with about tearing down the fence between our houses, or at least building a door so that we didn’t have to walk ALL the way to the front of the house when we wanted to visit. And when Brendan inevitably needed to ‘run away’ in his early teenage years, I was comforted, because I was certain he would run next door to the uncles extra bedroom – the one where we used to lay him, surrounded by a wall of pillows, after he fell asleep in Uncle Darin’s arms. And when we went to visit colleges with Brendan, I knew the uncles would be with us – or at home with the brown dog who in our absence was only comfortable at Camp Casler, or with them. And when we dropped our son off at his first dorm room, I was certain the Uncles would be waiting for us at home with a bottle of wine and a box of kleenex.
And people move. And that’s okay. We want to be both roots and wings for those closest to us. To have mature and unconditional relationships that recognize the fact that proximity is of little importance to matters of the heart. But I’m not ready for that yet. While I congratulate one of my best friends on an incredible and well deserved promotion, and I look forward to trips where we visit both Disneyland AND the uncles – while I remind myself that video chats are magical space healers, and that distance has only made the heart grow fonder and the visits more drenched in love and memories for Brendan and his east coast family – while I know that nothing will ever change the way we feel about the uncles, today I mourn our loss. In my restless sleep last night I pondered unsavory things like what Halloween would look like next year, or how to explain to Brendan that he can’t walk up and ring the doorbell anymore. That he can’t sit on the bench under our bedroom window and call out for Uncle Brian and Uncle Darin at the top of his lungs. I have come far enough in my life to trust that God has a plan. That everything happens for a reason. But without the benefit of hindsight, today my heart is too heavy from the loss of one of the important pieces that came together to create the life I always wanted. The one I never could have imagined. And again I’m grateful for the clarity to have lived in the moment, rather than waiting for hindsight to discover that this had been one of the happiest times in my life.
